Not Me Monday

This didn't happen today, but I've been thinking for awhile that I should do another of those "Not Me Monday" posts, so here goes.

I did not drive my daughter to the wrong house for a birthday party.  Not me.  Especially because I've been to this particular house several times before and would obviously recognize it.

And I certainly didn't knock on the wrong house and stand impatiently waiting as no one answered.

And I didn't go back to the van trying to remember this friend's phone number because I wouldn't have left the invitation sitting on the kitchen counter at home - because I've been to this house and did not need directions.

Therefore, I did not have to drive back to my house to get the phone number.  Not me.  And I didn't phone up the friend and ask them why they weren't answering the door when we came to the party.

I didn't drive back, to the wrong again, because that would be ludicrous!  I didn't doublecheck the street (bay!) address and even though I couldn't see the house number I didn't assume it was the right one - because we all know what assume means.

I didn't march back up the driveway and ring the doorbell and knock again on the wrong house, even after noticing that I thought it was odd that they had removed their neat school bus shaped garbage bin holder from the end of their driveway.  Not me.  I have a firm grasp of the obvious and would never put two and two together to make 5.

I didn't have to try to mask my growing irritation as I asked my daughter how much she really wanted to go to this birthday party.  Not me!  I'm the epitome of patience and grace, always.

I didn't call the parents back again to tell them politely but stiffly that they still weren't answering the door.  To which I obviously would not have heard them tell me that I was at the wrong house and the dad was on his way to direct me to the right one...... on the other end of the bay.

No, not me.

I didn't watch in horror as said dad's van pulled in behind me while still on the phone, and therefore did not meekly have to follow him to his house, that I've been to numerous times.  Not me.

I didn't have to apologize profusely and wonder at my own idiocy, not me.

And I certainly was not annoyed at myself for wasting 1/2 an hour of an incredibly busy day driving my daughter to a party that was only a 2 minute drive away.  Nope, not me.